Sunday, March 4, 2012

The Best Salesman On Earth

         He knew they wouldn’t want to be publicly embarrassed
         After he sold them a tower in Paris
         They desperately needed to have waterworks installed
         And he casually sold them Niagara Falls
         With the infinite grace of one destined from birth
         To be the best salesman on earth

         He appeared in commercials knowing just how they yearned
         To wage war on obesity and crucify heartburn
         And needed their curiosities piqued
         While reality television was voting off the weak
         That their hunger for something exhilarating and free
         Could be sated with cold beer and pizza delivery
         Thanks to the best salesman on earth,
         They could just stay home and take on girth

         He scurried away to his palatial retreat
         And the servants who waited to anoint his feet
         And while regular people were taking for granted
         He was slowly but surely acquiring this planet
         That’s how much his hide was worth,
         As the best salesman on earth.